That is what I said to myself on Saturday. On Saturday, I really believed I would never write another word. I totally considered chucking it all. I said, "I shall delete all of my stories. All of my picture books, my novel that I agonized over for the longest time. I was ready to chuck it all. I had cried, said a bad word or three (to myself of course, and I nevah evah say those words)and literally just wanted to crawl under the bed and say, "GO AWAY WORLD!" I knew that I suck at doing this and I just didn't want any part of it anymore. I just wanted my life to go back to before I started writing. Except keep my friends, my blogging pals, but I couldn't see spending all of this time on something that I suck at.
Fast forward to yesterday. The flowers weren't exactly blooming again, but I did notice a faint and I do mean faint tinge of hope that I didn't suck at writing. But how would I know? I mean, if I'd been lying to myself about my writing skills all these many years then who's to say I wasn't doing it again. I evidently had become very adept at being untruthful about this very subject.
I examined my motives. They were harmless enough. I didn't want riches(thank goodness), I just loved writing. I examined my work ethic and discovered that I loved working hard at writing. I realized a hunger burned inside of me. I found that I was focused too. So why then did my writing suck?
I came to a conclusion that I need to share with all of you. My pals in the blogosphere. My writing on Saturday probably sucked(I deleted it) but my writing in general is great, most of the time. But get this. You have to write badly to get better. The key here is you have to stick with it, just like you have to stick with anything you do in life. You keep growing because you keep learning.
Practice makes perfect? Yep. The old adage is true. AAAARRRRGGGGGHHHHH! You mean mom was right all along? Yikes!
So I will remember this the next time I feel like dumping it all again. Or will I? :) Thanks for listening. :) Er...I mean reading.